Love, love, love the color
Tuesday, March 28, 2017
Friday, December 25, 2015
Christmas Contentment
Christmas is probably one of my favorite holidays, and also my least favorite holiday. I love the meaning of it all--that Christ came in a very humble and helpless form--a baby, and all to just redeem me! It is amazing, and fills me with wonder and hope. My christmases growing up were filled with happiness and family. A lot of family. There were always extended family gatherings with lots of cousins and fun. We had traditions of egg nog on Christmas Eve, with a fire in the fire place. It was a gas fireplace with the logs that never burned, and gave off hardly any heat, but we were in Southern California so no big deal, right? Worsterbrochies were for dinner, along with a broccoli cream corn casserole and some kind of jello salad. My mom had these silver trays that stacked and there were different kinds of cookies on them. Along with that were pickles and crackers and cheese. When we got older, sparkling cider was added. Christmas morning was a breakfast casserole and apricot juice. The apricot juice was key. Stockings were opened and so were the Santa gifts. I can remember sitting around and feeling all of my presents, shaking them trying to figure out what they were. My brother Scott decided he was going to try prevent me from guessing what my gift was, and so wrapped them as sneakily as he could. One year he gave me a set of Magic Markers all wrapped up individually. Jay and I were the best at guessing. The year I got a packet of sugar in my stocking was my favorite Christmas. Everyone looked at me expectantly and I did not know what to make of it. Pretty soon they were telling me that they would be happy to have it if I didn't want it. Took me awhile, but finally I realized the packet of sugar represented the horse, Sugar, that was in the corral. Supposedly we were just "taking care" of her for a little while.
Gradually, Christmas has been more and more stressful. First it was trying to make too many things for people while having and raising babies. I put a lot of pressure on myself, mimicking my mom who always made things for us. Nice things. Things that were meaningful and lovely. My mom was a very thoughtful giver. There were some years that Christmas was at my house. Living in Northern California, those from Southern California typically stayed at my house. One year I had my parents, my sister's family (all 7 of them), and my brother's family (5 of them) plus I had 4? kids, or maybe I was pregnant. Really I don't remember. For awhile family came every other year. Can I say how much fun I had hosting everyone? I loved having family around. But since my parents have passed, we don't get together at all. With anyone. Not even the brother who lives 15 minutes away. Or the cousins who are up here with my Aunt. I miss the extended family, although I get it. Kids have gotten older and started families of their own. Getting together gets very complicated, and without someone to organize and push (well, really demand) to get together it just doesn't happen.
This year has been particularly hard. I have struggled to maintain any facade of cheerfulness or of hope. We have moved, and I don't feel settled. I didn't want a tree. There was no money for gifts. Why even celebrate anything? Luc stepped in, and worked really hard, and decided we would have Christmas. He took the kids, along with Holly, and got a tree. He got everyone together to decorate. He bought a ton of gifts for everyone, and made sure there were Santa presents. Nick worked and bought his siblings gifts. Joel emptied his bank account and bought gifts. I let a lot of things go, in order to reduce some stress. Yes, we had worsterbrochies. Cause it isn't Christmas Eve dinner without the worsterbrochies. And we had a breakfast pizza casserole. But we didn't have the apricot juice (I think this is the first year we didn't do that), and I didn't spend very much money. I actually did make something for the kids--a drink cozy for mason jars that have a lid and straw. A little thing, really, but well received. And as I sit here typing, I am listening to my kids all play a game together, getting along and enjoying each other's company, and I am thankful. Very thankful. Because Christmas is the story of redemption, of reconciliation, of family and love for each other. And this is what I have.
Gradually, Christmas has been more and more stressful. First it was trying to make too many things for people while having and raising babies. I put a lot of pressure on myself, mimicking my mom who always made things for us. Nice things. Things that were meaningful and lovely. My mom was a very thoughtful giver. There were some years that Christmas was at my house. Living in Northern California, those from Southern California typically stayed at my house. One year I had my parents, my sister's family (all 7 of them), and my brother's family (5 of them) plus I had 4? kids, or maybe I was pregnant. Really I don't remember. For awhile family came every other year. Can I say how much fun I had hosting everyone? I loved having family around. But since my parents have passed, we don't get together at all. With anyone. Not even the brother who lives 15 minutes away. Or the cousins who are up here with my Aunt. I miss the extended family, although I get it. Kids have gotten older and started families of their own. Getting together gets very complicated, and without someone to organize and push (well, really demand) to get together it just doesn't happen.
This year has been particularly hard. I have struggled to maintain any facade of cheerfulness or of hope. We have moved, and I don't feel settled. I didn't want a tree. There was no money for gifts. Why even celebrate anything? Luc stepped in, and worked really hard, and decided we would have Christmas. He took the kids, along with Holly, and got a tree. He got everyone together to decorate. He bought a ton of gifts for everyone, and made sure there were Santa presents. Nick worked and bought his siblings gifts. Joel emptied his bank account and bought gifts. I let a lot of things go, in order to reduce some stress. Yes, we had worsterbrochies. Cause it isn't Christmas Eve dinner without the worsterbrochies. And we had a breakfast pizza casserole. But we didn't have the apricot juice (I think this is the first year we didn't do that), and I didn't spend very much money. I actually did make something for the kids--a drink cozy for mason jars that have a lid and straw. A little thing, really, but well received. And as I sit here typing, I am listening to my kids all play a game together, getting along and enjoying each other's company, and I am thankful. Very thankful. Because Christmas is the story of redemption, of reconciliation, of family and love for each other. And this is what I have.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
November 29 2015
Apparently I am now a grandma. This is my grandchild. I was left in charge to watch her while Regan went to work to substitute. Teach that is. Regan is very safety conscious and makes sure every one is buckled. 
Sunday, November 23, 2014
November
I got sort of derailed last year, when our dog, Anastasia, had to be put down for bone cancer. Exactly one week later I found my milk cow, Elsie, dead. It was so sad. I had gotten a seasonal job, and was relying on the kids to feed her. The door to the garage had been left open and I believe she got into the chicken food. I didn't notice her not feeling well (working, remember?) and so I didn't take appropriate steps to help her. Which if I had been paying attention, I totally could have. It didn't have to happen. Those were two very painful losses. I regrouped though, and started thinking about what kind of animal(s) would fit into our little homestead. Although the Dexter is supposed to be able to live on a small amount of land, it seems that our property isn't full of enough good nutrients to truly support a cow, even a small one like Elsie. She was always hungry it seemed. So, goats? I didn't really like the milk from the goats I borrowed before. Plus, we would have to build a shelter for them. But I really wanted milk, so I decided to try to make it work. We have a fenced in area around the chicken coop, and it is fenced on the top as well. We decided to just build 3 walls around that, and add a tin roof. It isn't great, but so far it is keeping out the rain.
Next, we needed goats. There weren't a lot of offerings in February. However, one person was trying to sell some about 2 hours away. The price was right, and so I contacted her and up we went. She desperately wanted to sell her goats. They hadn't had any health tests, but at 3 for 100$ the price was right. And, they were all pregnant. We took them home in March. By the end of May I had 9 goats. I sold all but three--we kept one mom and 2 babies. She wasn't the one I was planning on keeping at all, but she became so sweet and easy after she had her babies! Plus, she had the only baby that was polled. She is an easy keeper as well. Then, I bought another goat as she was cheaper than a milk machine, which was what I was wanting. She is a kinder goat, and gives very rich milk. I will have to post pictures in another post.
My kids all like the milk, and whatever was causing the goatiness of the milk from the borrowed goats seems to have been fixed; so all in all it has been a good solution.
I had a fabulous garden this year, and hope that next year will be even better as I learn more, and the soil is improved even more.
Next, we needed goats. There weren't a lot of offerings in February. However, one person was trying to sell some about 2 hours away. The price was right, and so I contacted her and up we went. She desperately wanted to sell her goats. They hadn't had any health tests, but at 3 for 100$ the price was right. And, they were all pregnant. We took them home in March. By the end of May I had 9 goats. I sold all but three--we kept one mom and 2 babies. She wasn't the one I was planning on keeping at all, but she became so sweet and easy after she had her babies! Plus, she had the only baby that was polled. She is an easy keeper as well. Then, I bought another goat as she was cheaper than a milk machine, which was what I was wanting. She is a kinder goat, and gives very rich milk. I will have to post pictures in another post.
My kids all like the milk, and whatever was causing the goatiness of the milk from the borrowed goats seems to have been fixed; so all in all it has been a good solution.
I had a fabulous garden this year, and hope that next year will be even better as I learn more, and the soil is improved even more.
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Stranded
I am stuck at a bus station in Bakersfield. I was on my way down to see Luc sing at Westmont, and to see my sister and brother. I can't get through because the grapevine is closed due to weather, which is funny because I was all worried about it snowing and causing problems at home, which it didn't. I didn't even think about it snowing in the south. I should have taken the train directly to Santa Barbara. I guess it could be worse. I could be stuck on the bus on the road with no where to go.
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
2 down
We (Joel, Sam, Gabriel, Regan and myself) took Luc down to college this last weekend. My sister was there to help get him in and help me navigate around the campus and take care of the kids. I must say, Luc picked a wonderful college. As we were taking a tour he kept telling me that it was "perfect". He is at Westmont. If you know anything about it, it is a beautiful campus, with views of the beach from his dorm and the library. There are a lot of good resources for the students, and the staff really wants to see the kids succeed. Leaving him there has been bittersweet. So happy for him; he is going to have a wonderful experience. However, he is going to be missed by everyone here, although he isn't all that far away, and the train travels between here and there as well.
Life has gotten much quieter with Luc and Brianna gone, as well as with Nick and Gabriel in school. I actually got a bunch of laundry done, cleaned up the kitchen, and vacuumed quite a bit of the house. Feeling pretty good about all of that. Now if I could only find Joel's phone.....
Life has gotten much quieter with Luc and Brianna gone, as well as with Nick and Gabriel in school. I actually got a bunch of laundry done, cleaned up the kitchen, and vacuumed quite a bit of the house. Feeling pretty good about all of that. Now if I could only find Joel's phone.....
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